


Return of the Living Bread

by FleetSparrow



Series: Drawlloween 2018 [1]
Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: Bad Puns, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-07-23 10:06:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16156853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FleetSparrow/pseuds/FleetSparrow
Summary: Dick's bread has gone bad.I mean, really bad.





	Return of the Living Bread

“Dick,” Jason called, standing in Dick’s kitchen. “I think your bread’s gone bad.”

“It’s fine,” Dick yelled from the shower. “Just cut off whatever’s moldy.”

“No, I mean, it’s gone _bad_ ,” Jason said, watching the bread stand up and arm itself. “It’s got tiny guns.”

“Jason, you’re so weird,” Dick said, laughing.

“I mean it! It’s got tiny guns and, oh my god, it’s using bread bullets,” Jason said, staring in horror at the loaf of bread. “It’s ripping off pieces of itself and loading it into—Ow!” He batted away the crumb bullets.

“Stop exaggerating!” Dick yelled.

“I’m not—!” Jason batted away another volley. “Oh my god, it’s got a cannon. Where did it get the artillery?”

The bread yelled and fired a small mound at Jason, hitting him square in the face.

“Ow! That’s it. Into the oven!”

Jason grabbed the bread, opened the oven, and threw it inside. Slamming the door, he turned the oven on to 400 degrees.

“See how you like being double baked, you little carbohydrate killer!” he said.

Ten minutes later, Dick came out of the shower to the smell of burning bread.

“Jason, what did you do?”

“It had it coming!”

Dick toweled off his hair, watching Jason pull out the twice-baked bread and throw it into the trash.

“You really need to buy fresher food,” Jason said.


End file.
